the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
