Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
