I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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