This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
