I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
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