Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
