I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
My feet surprised me
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
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