if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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