So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Randomize
