Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I'm determined to sit on that face.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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