My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Come see our sink grown plant.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
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