I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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