It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
wow bdsm is so cute
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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