Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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