So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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