Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
