Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
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