doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Randomize
