wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.