Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(713): View more from Texas

wait, did i just see you litter out your window??

(281): View more from Texas

umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.

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(386): View more from Florida

Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm

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(703): View more from Virginia

You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?

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(313): View more from Michigan

I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.

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These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
Read it at the TFLN blog
(850): View more from Florida

why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours

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(919): View more from North Carolina

The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers

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(678): View more from Georgia

If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.

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(425): View more from Washington

Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.

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