the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
