with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
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