Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
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