the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
