3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
