We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Randomize
