Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
