yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
