i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
