Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize
