That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Help. Why am I so naked?
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
