you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
