do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
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