check it out our google latitudes are spooning
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
