Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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