I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
