He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Randomize
