how can u be prego again
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
