You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Randomize
