All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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