hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize