Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Randomize
