I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
