My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
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