im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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