yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
