If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
