If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
