Sry I called you an 8
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize
