Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize