glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Randomize
